Thursday, September 1, 2016

Train Tantrum

Ever hear of road rage? Some moron on the L.A. freeway cuts you off at 67 miles per hour so he can get one car length ahead of you and then slams on his brakes to avoid an accident? It might happen daily but one time, this time, it really sets you off. You gesture with an aggressive middle finger or you resort to near homicidal driving tactics to get back in front of him. There’s a reason why they make you get a license to drive those killing machines! Road Rage. 

Not much of that in a small town in Indiana. No ten lane traffic traveling at high speeds. 

But what we DO have is about seven different train lines that pass through this town, and I mean THROUGH town. No alternate routes, no bridges, just crossing one street after another. And they are required to blast their deafening horns several times at every intersection. At all hours of the day. And night. 

I realized, today, I succumbed to Train Tantrum. 

I’ve been driving to work and back home for lunch and dinner for several days while my wife is out of town. I need to let the dog out and to feed her and the cats. Yes, That Guy Who Walks has been doing time as That Guy Who Drives. With only a small window of time before I need to get back, I DO NOT want to get caught by a train. 

I was driving home for dinner and the warning lights started flashing at the intersection. I hit the accelerator. I was NOT going to wait for a train, not THIS time, Bunky! I flew past the tracks as the cross bucks came down behind me and I zipped through the intersection on the other side. Ha! I won!

No, really, it was very exciting! At one point I think all four wheels left the ground and I was James Bond or Jason Bourne, or someone exciting whose name begins with J. Luckily I didn’t become a Jackson Pollack. 

Train Tantrum.

This evening, without the adrenaline rush, and with a calmer demeanor, I confess now that it was stupid. But dammit, even as I write this, I can hear another train wailing its way across the intersections in town. And I’ll hear them again at midnight and two-seventeen and three-oh-eight! Where is the raven to appear at my chamber door and croak Nevermore?! 

I need to get back to walking. 


Stay safe, my friends.